Soul Journey Series #1: Desire Map–mapping me & my desires. I’m the map!

I was going to wait to write about the Desire Map until I had gotten to the actual figuring out of my core desired feelings.

(and because, apparently, there is still some resistance showing up…and it’s taking me a freakin’ long time to do this!)

So. I’ve read the 1st part (Book One: The Theory) of Danielle LaPorte’s The Desire Map.

I am now at Book Two: The Workbook. You have to do the work if you want to make the change.

Now, I have been at Book Two, for a very long time as stated here. But I’m ready to do this, and still hoping a friend of mine does it with me (and joins me here). Danielle LaPorte calls the start of this section a “Soul Limber,” a warm up before we dig in. Don’t you love that? So here’s a sneak peek at a few of my answers:


i crave: freedom, time, creativity, romance, dates, long lunches, joy, passion, laughter

I need to give myself more permission to be: me–always, speak my truth dare to say things

What do I do even though I don’t want to: be reasonable, work


When in doubt: laugh

I believe in: fairies, angels, myself

What I know to be true: love trumps all, laughter can change a person’s day, creativity kills depression, friends should know where the bodies are buried


The color of joy: pink! yellow! orange!

In my  body, appreciation feels like: a warm flow from my solar plexus radiating outward.

Ecstasy lives: on the other side of letting go


When I’m feeling free and strong I tend to: make great things, do great things, lift people up

I feel vulnerable when: I’m baring my soul (like now), or when people bring up money

In crisis: I keep my head

When I’m generous, I: give of my time and energy and expertise

I stop being generous when: I have nothing to give or it’s not appreciated

My most regular waking thought: happy, followed by: are the kids okay?

There were waaayyyyy more questions, but so far I feel pretty soul-limbered, even though as I look over all my answers, I can see a pattern of happiness, but also an underlying pattern of me not always believing in myself. Looks like I have some work in front of me folks! I may as well have fun getting to the me-ist me I can, right? I’m ready for the next part:

GRATITUDE & WHAT’S NOT WORKING. What I think will be great about this, is she, not only makes you write what you’re grateful for (in specific areas of your life) you then write why you’re grateful. She makes you get super specific, which gets to the core of your gratitude.

Are you on a soul journey?



Regret is a four letter word dressed up as a 6 letter word for a non-stop bad Halloween party. Remember that party, where that guy kept following you around? And you did everything to not talk to him, but there he was. Yeah, that one.

I’m here to tell you that regrets are not necessities. We think they’re natural: “Regrets, I’ve had a few…” Even Sinatra knew not to worry too much over them. But why do we think having the bad thing’s tentacles burrowed into our heart/soul is natural? Our mistakes help make us who we are, they are a part of us–but they are not us.

I think we can learn to stand beside them, even notice them, hello messy divorce…you are in the past, there is nothing I can do about you now. I did the best I could at the time and now I know to listen to my instincts.

Regret wallows.
Regret doesn’t move on or decide to change.
Regret is quicksand.
Regret is blaming yourself.
Regret is all about yourself.
Regret is selfish.
Regret folds you in on yourself.
Regret implodes.
If regret is a verb, it’s a backward one–living in the past.

What is the opposite of regret? Unregretful? That seems callous. Contentedness? Kinda boring. I think we look for the antidote, not the opposite!

The antidote for me is forgiveness.
Usually forgiving myself, but can also involve others.

And mindfulness.
And forward thinking–what am I working toward?

I’ve promised myself to try to make my actions unregrettable (it is too a word!), mindfulness helps, immediate forgiveness helps, accepting responsibility also good. What would you add?



A long, long, l o n g time ago I decided to start reading The Fire Starter Sessions and The Desire Map and The Happy Hour Effect while also doing the accompanying Life Map … as things like to happen to stop us from doing stuff, especially when we try to do ALL the stuff at once, ahem, they did and I stopped–reading and doing the “work” that goes along with these books.

Fast forward to a few months ago, I made a promise to finish reading The Fire Starter Sessions, okay, did that! Fast forward again to NOW. Hello stress at work! (Even my #onegoodcup wasn’t completely working). That’s when I looked around my house and saw the books and within each book a bookmark (because we don’t dog-ear pages!) about halfway through. Hm.

I had stopped right in the middle of doing the work! And I know why–it’s hard!

When I started working on different aspects of myself, whether it was: how I wanted to feel, or what to let go of, what to let in–I wasn’t just working on the manifestation of those things in my life today…oh, nonononnonono. Ha! NO. There were layers and layers of messy overgrown crap that was being unearthed and that lead to other crap (crap that I didn’t even know about, thankyouverymuch).

Those damn revelations lead to more work. *sigh*. And danger. Because, what if I wanted to change something, why, then I’D HAVE TO CHANGE SOMETHING!

I stuffed all my unmentionables in a suitcase(s) (cough* baggage *cough) without realizing that sooner or later some, seemingly, random thing will happen that’ll cause the CUSTOM AGENT of my soul/being/self to rifle through said baggage. Yeah. And all that crap I didn’t DECLARE is going to be on display for everyone. And now I’d have to deal with it on the fly (no pun intended).

So, ALL analogies aside, I’m going to start unpacking one thing at a time. I’m going to work through my Core Desired Feelings from The Desire Map first, really work on it. Then when I’m clear on that, I’ll work on my Life Map through The Happy Hour Effect. And, I’m gonna share. I figure, it’s one way to have an accountability partner! I have a friend who’s reading The Desire Map too, I’m trying to rope her into sharing as well! Yay, peer pressure!

I hope you join me on this soul journey!
What stops you from doing the “work?”

HOW Did You Want to be When You Grew Up?


I know I thought about WHAT I wanted to be, but did I think about HOW I wanted to be? It’s a good question and maybe it’s a question we should keep asking ourselves. And, if you have kids, even grown ones, keep asking them too.

Me at 11: Well, I’ll be a psychologist, children’s psychologist–because, that seems good.

Me at 15: Well, I’ll be famous, an actress, but on Broadway–not Hollywood, and people will love me and pay me lots of money. And I’ll have my picture taken all the time. And eat out a lot. And I’ll have long shiny hair.

Me at 18: I’ll take classes aimed at psychology AND try out for the theater.

I’m sure I thought I’d still be a good person–but only in the broadest sense of the term.

How did I want to be?

I think it’s a question we should start asking ourselves every morning:
How do I want to be…today?
Someone people trust, someone who laughs a lot, someone who sees the good…

Be intentional about it and show up with it wherever you’re going.

Today I want to be attentive. In the moment, aware of everything around me–other’s needs as well as my own.

Showing up. Almost as good as a standing ovation.

So tell me, how do you want to be today?

Interview with an Author…An 11 Year Old Author (actually she was 10 when she wrote the book!)

Sophia Kriz is an 11 year old, gamer, zombie slayer, dog lover, softball player, who also happens to have written a book:

8 Steps to Liking Yourself

by, Sophia Kriz


I had the good luck to interview Sophia on the day of her book’s release. The rumor that she agreed to it because I’m her Great Aunt is not true, and also false…
Q: What did today feel like?
Sophia: Proud, that a lot people wanted to support me for this. Excited.

Q: What do you wish every kid knew?
Sophia: God loved them and cares for them. God loves you so much.

Q: What’s your next book?
Sophia: My next book…we haven’t decided – Lala wants to work on How to Throw a Great Party.
Q: You’re going to collaborate with Lala? (Lala, is Sophia’s great grandma, AKA Joan Kennedy–one of Those Kennedy Women!)
Sophia: Yes, she has a file started on her computer. Also, I know a lot about dogs, so I’d like to write a book about dogs.

Q: What made you decide to write this?
Sophia: We (she and her family) were at a water park and my (younger) sister was going on all the big water slides and I was going on the smaller slides and it made me feel bad. But then I was talking to my mom about steps to liking yourself. I thought: I bet a lot of kids feel this way – and who cares what other people think you are.

Q: What was the hardest part?
Sophia: Probably working on it! It was frustrating and I’d think, how can I get it done? But we did get it done, and I feel really proud.

Q: What would you tell someone, a kid or an adult, who wanted to write a book but wasn’t sure where to start or what to write about?
Sophia: Think of things you have problems with and think if people would like to hear about it, then sit down and brainstorm. (When Sophia told me this, I thought of all the times I’d heard “you teach what you need to learn,’ and here, it just came out of her mouth! So, now I’m thinking of all the things I have problems with…brainstorming will ensue!)

To order your copy of 8 Steps To Liking Yourself
Send $5.00, plus $1.00 shipping to:
Sophia Kriz
6236 Kerry Lane
Fridley, MN 55432

For every book Sophia sells, she’s donating $1.00
to the Humane Society to take care of dogs and cats.