Hopelessly Devoted to You

 

Who are you hopelessly devoted to?

Child

Lover

Partner

Parent

Sibling

Friend…

What about yourself?

Did that make you feel a little squeemy? (It’s a word.) A whole lot selfish, or maybe you think I’m selfish for even asking the question.

Well let me tell you why I ask this; I was feeling lost in my own life a while back. Like, reading the lines and entering on cue but not part of the writing team, not a producer or a director. It got me thinking: if I don’t care about my role, I don’t care about anything.

We all know this: you have to love yourself before you can truly love anyone else.

We know it, but do we believe it? And if we do, do we really understand the depth of what it means to love yourself? It’s not something we do by rote, like answering the priest with our, “thy will be done” said without any conviction or awareness. Yeah, yeah…love myself unconditionally. Got it.

No. I didn’t get it. Or, rather, I forgot it. We have to fall in love with ourselves again. I’m not talking Narcissism, that is definitely not what I’m talking about.

This is not about seeking attention from others.

This is about paying attention to who you are and honoring that.

Devotion. I love that word, it makes me feel all gushy and intentional. It’s my core desired feeling for Creativity and Learning, one of five areas of our life Danielle LaPorte writes about in The Desire Map. But now I see it’s how I want to feel about myself, my whole self too. And not just feel it, I want it to be a verb for my life.

Merriam-Webster’s definition of Devoted: having strong love or loyalty for someone or something.

Maybe if you’re still feeling squeemy about being hopelessly devoted to yourself you could swallow being loyal to yourself–it reminds me of Shakespeare’s “To thine own self be true…” Be loyal to yourself and the things that are important to you.

For me, the first step in being loyal to myself is remembering who I want to be, and honoring that–making steps toward that next higher version of me.

How does this look?

The first thing I did was start saying affirmations. I am not even kidding.

Actually, the first thing I did was decide on the affirmations I wanted–what changes did I want to see? Those became the basis for my affirmations, then I wrote them,

…and then I let them languish

…and then I found them and rewrote them

…and then I said, “You are gonna start doing this today, dagnabbit! And you are committing to a year of living affirmatively! Ha!”

And then I started saying them. Every day. Out loud. Five times each.

I keep a Bullet Journal and in it I made a mini daily accomplishment thingy and affirmations are one of my daily goals–I really really like seeing all the boxes colored-in for saying them.

Then some little things started to happen, then some other things…one thing that happened was I spoke in front of an audience of about 125 people with my sister, and I wasn’t heart-pounding nervous–I had fun doing it.

One of my affirmations is: I’m an excellent speaker, logical, well prepared, and completely at ease in front of any group. I’d been repeating that 5 times a day out loud for 2 1/2 months.

I’ve been re-energized to do the things that move me forward and bring me joy–like writing and exercising, like being re-committed to helping folks support their health and happiness through essential oils Young Living

This is a continuous effort and a re-commitment every darn day (and evening).

I’m going to continue this conversation in upcoming posts–because its important and there’s lots to say!

What one thing could you start doing to show your devotion (loyalty) to yourself?

 

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